On Friday 1/19/18

Forgotten Crosses

Will the flames consume us whole?

What is liberation?
What is freedom?
Are we striving towards
the ultimate in both?
Transcend body.
How? What path?

We are living in a time of lies and fear.

Doors opening and closing
We pass through and back
Yet what distances do we cross
I am here
I am here

Living with myself
Trying to be good
Trying to not fall into my own traps
Trying to not fall into despair
Reaching out
This world
Home and hell

A better world starts with you.
A better world starts within.

Clarity can be attained but it must be held and built upon.

This struggle does not have to be forever.

Morning Thoughts 5/7/17

The rains have come and gone
What of them now remains
Wet stain upon concrete
A chill in the morning air

I listen to the soul of you calling
I listen and grow still
Absorbing the sound
Growing the silence within

I wish for these lesson to be in my marrow
To become part of my being
Undeniably whole

For Health & Spirit

Foolish blood and habits
Grow in the understanding
of what you lack
A true light awaits within

Om Shanti Om
Shanti Om
Shanti Om

Soul reaching out for the light

Clarity of Being

I am seeking freedom both within and without.

Oathkeeper or Oathbreaker: which are you?

Grow in both Body and Mind.

Ecstatic Elevation

Born into this body
Into this time and place
Home by any other name

A state of perpetual searching.

two fragments

Measure yourself in light
I told you I loved you
You told me I was beautiful
The light we carry
radiates through

Season of Forgiving
give yourself
a small gift and carry it
unseen

1.) Mother (Where were You When I Saw Jesus?)

2.) Hypocrisy is Human Nature.


3.) We can't be alone when we're together
      Telling ourselves this
      Truth or misconception

Processional

Not ready to own up to my part of the blame
Pass it off again and again
I'll take this load if you'll take your share
Let the days gather behind us

Scattered Thoughts All Gathered Together (evening - 6/4/16)

Interpretations of Reality

Create the world you wish through selective perception

Change and Realignment

Consciousness moving through an eternal present of possibility

Beauty as a sign of temporary attraction

What is everlasting?

The Business of Life & Loss

How to Move On Without Ever Letting Go

How quickly we move from disappointment to acceptance.

These late nights move through us
as we move through them

Memories of distant possibilities are nothing more
than snow melting in the noon time sun.

Better to let some memories gather dust.

we were done and
that was it
and that was that

My back is nothing more than
bone and flesh
and can be broken
far more easily
than I care to admit

What is fit to be buried and what
is fit to be kept?

Desire and Reason rarely have anything in common.

I need some silence to balance out all the noise in my life.

No reason to be awake
yet you cannot fall asleep
so you stay up until
the night takes you

One must look past mere physical beauty to find substance

Enraptured by her beauty
I became a slave to an ideal
that no one else could
ever hope to match

Can we ever find the beach that has no end?

When all you want to do is talk
and the night is late
and the glass is empty
but everyone else is gone
or asleep
so you sit alone
and hope the words
will find you

I would have loved you if
you ever gave me the chance

Only the dead are free.

Like the silence that stretches across the desert at midnight.

The restlessness of the soul.

Let the page feed your spirit.

We let each other go as gently
as a breathe being exhaled.

Broken Teeth and Bloody Tongues

The Overlap of Dreams

Sueno pero recuerdo
lo que tuve recordar

Shadows that exist only at night.

There was never anything to hold onto
but we clung to another
as though nothing could tear us apart

My broken bones
cannot be reset
I grow together
fractured and imperfect

The illusion of choice
The choice of illusion

These lonely nights of worry
Where are you right now
Don't worry
I'm just here trying to breathe

Notebook Dump #1

We do not merely stumble into our goals.
We must pursue them as if in pursuit of prey.

Success means never being fully satisfied.

standing at the cliff
water lapping at the shore
watching from above

tie together thread
what are you hoping to make
watching from above

Must a white flower symbolize death?

Active Reincarnation

The endlessly blooming heart

A group of old women drinking while whale watching.

Keep the ambitious seed.

three scenes from a notebook

the heart can always break   further
frag menting into
shards of glass
glittering in the night


the startling difference between who I've always been
and who I was


Time is the unknown quantity
and we are
always trying to solve for x

A Night in Fragments

I.

Honor the struggle.

II.

My will turns to ash.

III.

Your life is only as interesting

as you are willing to make it.

IV.

The open mouth scream

of freeway wind

rushing through 

rolled down windows

V.

It is easy to feel

a great loneliness

late at night

while others sleep

unaware of the ills

that keep us awake.

VI.

everything fails in time.

VII.

I can hear its beat

though we are not

in the same space

VIII.

the green light flickers

turns red

then green once more

then red

flickers at a pace

faster than you eyelids

IX.

I have left the light on

for you.

X.

mangled fingers

the scarred flesh

of the forearm

a visible history

XI.

table kalimba

always ready for a touch

singing silver tongues

XII.

How can we call it love?

XIII.

truth in fragmentation

XIV.

yield nothing

XV.

He is as hollow

as a chocolate 

easter bunny

XVI.

let's not call it love

let's not call it anything

let's call

let's talk

let's let go

XVII.

useless machinery

a soul in transit

lost between two points

XVIII.

you can't go to sleep

you don't even bother

A Slew of Lines

We were beautiful when we met.


Aging is the toll we pay

for the greatest gift.


Walls are nothing without a roof.

Shelter is a creature comfort.


My mind waits

for inspiration,

my hands write

without hesitation.


Fragments free of worry.

Every Broken Piece Together Again

I.
a stare that burns

through false fronts

rips out the carpet

finds the hardwood


II.
a night that does not need you

does not hear you

does not need thing anything from you


III.
There was the one who had a boyfriend
in europe. She said it was ok

it was an open relationship. It was fun
but it got boring.

There was the one you loved

She loved you

once

So what?


IV.
Night-

just this

surrounding me

closing in

close to me

close

touching my skin


V.
ideas bleed slowly
ooze across a non
existent page
pool and dry
on no floor
but the one
you imagine
to be real

dead end fragments

Empty the vessel and let the waters still.


Transitions


There is a specific voice I hear as I read these words.


Inner monologue reverberating in concave spaces.


Caught between influence and imitation;


between admiration and devotion.
____________


Rusted iron moves slowly at best.
_________________


Do fish frozen in a river die?


Do their bodies rot and float downstream in the thaw?


_______________


Black Winter
___


Whose mask am I wearing?
________


Dumb Dumb Dumb


the voice doesn't work


it doesn't work


chords frozen


still


it doesn't work


it won't work


Dumb Dumb Dumb
____


In case I love you


please turn away.


Leave.


Forget me.


Forget everything.


In case you love me back


come to me.

IV

I

an amnesiac haze clouds morning thoughts

the same way a gray marine layer shrouds

the beach before burning off by mid-afternoon.

Past and Future become rearranged into 

a manner that refutes present ideas on

the nature of time. 

II

100 miles

A thousand paths

Each step a journey 

Roads without end

A circular path 

III

The mind wakes slower then the body

at morning. 

IV

Vacant Sea

What is it to find yourself here?

To find yourself in this place and not anywhere else?

Location as a reflection.
______

There are some thoughts you cannot bear to let go.

you always leave with the rain
nothing here can keep you still
nothing here can keep you


practicing forgetting
we've become masters of an art

A Rule of 6

1.)
She colored the sky with her eyes.


2.)
Drops dripping onto the ground,
your hand extended out
feeling the moisture
collect in your
palm.


3.)
We stole the breath from each others mouths
and gave ourselves no room to breathe.


4.)
Disorder is the only state of being some ever know.


5.)
Your heart dropped a beat
caused a flutter in your chest.


6.)
No more trying.

when the dying starts the living begins (fragments)

let's play a game that we'll all know.
_____
measure patterns of indifference
_____

Without the sun, the moon, the stars
the tide or changing of the seasons it
becomes hard to gauge the passage of
time. Day and night are non-existent.
Just a static gray consuming the sky.
(between)