Morning 7/9/17

Finding a Universal Consciousness
through all that which surrounds us
Light at the edge of Dawn
Words searching for expression
These hands ready to serve

I am ready
I must be willing
I am ready
to move beyond
this dawn

To go beyond mere survival
And transform our lives into
passion and creativity
To live and thrive from
our own sense of creation

The journey can only continue
if more steps are taken on the path

A choice is offered
A choice must be made

To reconcile mind and body
To live within form and out of it as well

Vibrations across strings
The essential hum of existence
A note rising and resonating

From a distance I have loved you
From a distance I still do

Beyond the rise and setting of the Sun
I am here divining words from the wind

Morning 7/8/17

Wake before the dawn and ask the Sun
what is keeping it so long?

Night begins to fade into light and the birds
have begun to wake. At this hour the world
is still peaceful, still beautiful in all it's natural
glory.

I think about leaving on a regular basis. I know
it is a foolish thing, even childish to think that
my problems would not follow me. That is
inherently false. We do not simply become
other people in a different place. We remain
ourselves even if the location has changed.
The heart of our lives remains. As I move
forward through this life I am growing in my
understanding of it even if parts of it still
confound me. This life continues to surprise
even as it drags us through mundane days.

I think about the love I've given and the love
that has been given to me. So much of it,
from so many, at different times.

Abuelo,
Cuando te despiertes hoy
vas oir los pajaros
afuera de tu cuarto
cantando por ti?

Are we always making a leap into eternity?

Take off your shoes and walk into the room.
Find a chair to sit or sit on one of the pillows
on the floor. Still yourself. Listen to the wind
through the windows. Feel the slight breeze.
We are here together. This is how it has always
been, always will be. Voice of God speaking
through us, calling out of names, transcending
to another place, another plane. Finding our
truth. Purify the heart and body. This path
calling to you.

You Are The Music.

I am the instrument through which the universe plays it's music.

There is music, soul, and expression
that is beyond technique. It cannot be
explained into reason, it must simply
be accepted for what it is. Purest release.

Morning 7/7/17

Transmitter and Receiver
Exist as both
To give and take
Let it all come through

Life and mortality Sequence of events How things
move through us and life I wonder about time as it
passes I wake up early and find myself reading and
writing Trying to let it all come through and flow
through my head These days These years Markers
of this life How we change How we still remain
the same I am learning to be still To silence my
mind To try and hear nothing yet still listen to
everything I hear birds yet do not understand their
language It does not stop me from listening From
the treetops where they are perched they call to
one another from a distance Flight and change
The will to move through sky with no hardship
Ease of motion An eternal dream of man

Dreams That Call

Awake yet still dreaming
I see my past and future
Aligned within the same place
The place my parents called home
The place they left for a new life
I hear it's whispers calling
Through years and memory
It is patient with it's call
Calling a son home
To roots and soil
Blood of my ancestors
Home to those who gave
Me this life and
Gave life to
Them in turn

Morning 7/6/17

The journey must simultaneously
be of the inner and outer world.
To search for one is to search
for the other. No journey is whole
with out both.

Morning 7/5/17

We must embrace the present
This now is infinite
Yet our lives are mere flickers of light

The path of enlightenment
is one I am drawn towards
I see my flaws and wish
to bring them to the light
to see them clearly and
change them in order
to change and better
myself

I must reinforce my willpower
I must make it steel
I cannot do this alone

The heart of creation beats within

Life gives birth to itself every day

to spend this life day dreaming

Walk through the door
You'll never be the same
It closes behind you
Locked shut
You keep walking

first light

first light spreads
across the sky
like wildfire

waking
i find myself among
the living once more

what to do
with this day
with this gift

i listen outside
my window
and hear

the birds sing
their answer
and fly away

i know
they are right
they usually are

daydreaming

Walking through doors
Room to room
Down the hall
Close it
Leave the lock off
In this place
Wandering through dreams
Where love existed
Choices were made
Looking at exit signs
Finding footsteps
Of my previous selves
Fingers move and touch
Down on piano keys
Hearing the weight of heart
This life moving through us
Measuring life by choices
And results
Searching for warmth
As Winter approaches
From a distant place
I can see the outlines
Of everything lost
At last a voice
Speaking softly
Yet I cannot
Hear the words

Morning 7/4/17

I am but one drop of water in the river that flows to the ocean.

Day by day I have been thinking about my existence and searching
for that which can bring meaning and comfort. Regardless of any
belief in life after this life, this life is but a fleeting moment. Meaning
is here but we must understand that the meaning is one we must
create for ourselves. To know that life is a finite gift should impel us
towards greater good, greater love, greater unity amongst all people.
This is not always the case but it should be an aim for us all. This
world does not lack for distractions and division. We must calm
those voices in this world in order to create something closer to the
ideal. The ideal may be always just out of reach but it is there, just
close enough to see and admire. We innately know the good we are
capable of. We can be loving and selfless but how can we grow this
within all? The path of seeking is one without end. What is it we seek?
Is it possible that a malaise of the soul is the underlying thing we are
trying to cure? Perhaps we can sense that the world as we have made
it at the present is one that is not best suited towards promoting the
greater unity that is needed. If we can create a world like this then
it is also within our means to change it for the better. To do so
would be a massive undertaking but it is a possibility. What shape
would this new world take? Of that, I cannot be sure. But fostering
greater dignity and equality would be steps of that world.

Sitting among the faithful believers
Feeling the power of their belief surround me
Letting myself submit to the fervency of their faith
If there is a God then God was there that day
I felt the wind through the canyon
Heard the peaceful rustle of leaves
Love of creation
Creation of Love

I strive to leave myself open to possibility
To hear what silence seeks to say
To embrace the self I know myself to truly be

I let the light of dawn enter
I let the light reflect from me

The slowness and quickness of life
bleed into one another
become one another

Stay Human.

Morning 7/3/17

How can one fully process certain experiences?
I am not speaking of the tragedies of life
and it's heartbreak
I speak of it's moments of harmony and
transcendence that give light
and inspire ways forward

To grow there must be a way forward
To move forward we must plan
and follow through

Morning 7/2/17

I wake and tell myself I am ready
Clearing mind and body
of any clouding substance
Days now of this fasting

These words through my lips
Heart in rhythm to the sound
Chant and connect

It's all in your head
Your thoughts shaped your perspective
Your thoughts create the world

Cycles of Sun and Moon
Tides of the Soul
Passing of time
What wisdom do we nurture

I have found the heart of creation
within you
within myself

Evening 7/1/17

This place is a beginning
This beginning gives birth to steps
These steps leads to a path
This path leads to experience
Those experiences are the journey
and the destination

we came as men and left as gods

everything keeps
      moving and s pin ning
com ingto geth er and pull  ing
apart

Morning 7/1/17

this life
waking us once more
for what
for movement
for forward motion

I'm lost and walking
Hoping to find a sense of place again
Faces I do not know staring back
and looking away
Too busy to care
Alone and walking
Digging through memory
Creating space
If I find you again
will we recognize each other
or walk on by
like everyone else

Is it my heart that is restless or is it my soul?
I am seeking understanding
A center that can hold

Endless mirrors in a hallway of endless doors
Turn the knob Open the door
Walk through

These roads will drive us

These peaks will define the journey but are not the whole of it.

We are waiting still
We are waiting
Years of obscurity
Waiting to have our day

Morning routine bleeds into afternoon laziness
The wheels are still and the car won't move
How soon will you get from there to here
No questions worth asking No answers at all
Place of dashed hopes and new expectations
The sky will eat us all alive Raindrop tears
Pale smile and unsure paths towards anything
Placated fears for now but how long can it last
Mirror mirror can you tell me anything of worth

Morning 6/30/17

Holy books and Holy names
Call upon the demons and angels
God and the Devil listening
Oh but could it be
Oh but it might
that they're listening
and don't know what to do
This world gives birth to you
yet is it enough to keep you
free of worry and pain

I wake up thinking about love
Come and gone between us

Yet we carry on

Summer in your eyes
Winter in your heart
Seasons out of balance
Searching for Spring

search within

Morning 6/29/17

How can we be strangers if we are
all children of the same mother?

To go beyond the darkness of night
To find the breaking dawn
To find light and life once more

I who am the river
I who am the water
I who fall
I who stay still
I who change forms
I who am forever

I offer this life to that which is greater than I

Unbound from a clouding vice
I wake from restful sleep
And feel strength growing
And building within

This life is enough
Yet we desire more and more
Can we be content

You will fall but you will rise
On your feet and on the path again

Morning Circle

When you are tired you will sleep
When you have had enough
You will wake
When you wake you will rise
When you rise you shall move
When you move you shall think
When you think you shall act
When you act you are living
When you are living you grow tired
When you are tired you will sleep
When you have had enough
You will wake

God in the Present

When I was God, I watched existence from my
omniscient perch in the heavens. I watched stars
come into being and die. I saw planets form and
life bloom from their primal reaches.

When I was God, I heard untold numbers of prayers
and hopes reach through the ether and take my ear,
pleading and hoping for my divine intervention to
make a difference in their lives.

When I was God, I was of myself and a part of this
existence. I could feel creation itself course through
me. My thoughts could wield anything into existence,
yet I had to learn how to restrain myself.

When I was God, I watched humanity in quiet wonder
as a parent watches a newborn. I saw my children be
cruel and kind and asked myself how we let one
another allow darkness of the heart.

When I was God, I grew tired and weary of existence
on my back. I wished to make myself separate from
myself. So, now I live as man quietly in this world,
watching and learning, waiting for a change.

Morning 6/27/17

My father has set the example
Follow

Remember the good which graces your life
Be grateful for what you have been given

My heart sings
My soul sings
I listen intently
Sing in harmony

Why this journey?
What other journey is there?

As our lives progress we move forward
and grow into love

Set small goals to achieve big goals

Cast light and understanding into the world

This longing for betterment
grows and grows
Better the body
Grow the soul

You are beautiful
As perfect as creation
meant you to be

An Honest Man

I must be honest and humble before myself
and this creation to admit I must stop and
let myself live with vice and excess tempered
I wish to lead a life of contemplation and
open thought but I cannot do so when I
purposely cloud my mind and judgement
I am human I am fallible I am weak I am
searching for the strength of will I feel I am
lacking right now I am not who I wish to be
Yet I know that self is within It is possible
to be what I know I can I must cease this
pattern which recurs I cannot run away from
myself This truth will follow I must gaze
into the mirror and accept the present in order
to create the future This body This spirit
are yearning for more Give more Be the
source of light you have been meant to be
all this time This self acceptance will be
difficult Follow through How many times
How many mornings have similar thoughts
come through you What has been learned
Break the wheel of habit but learn to lean
on and ask for help Let light be your guide

Morning 6/26/17

The journey is both the question and answer.

We are striving towards finding a meaning
towards understanding
We complicate our lives with so much
as to obscure the path of simplicity
Yet it is there waiting to be seen
and walked upon

I do not wish for you to live your life
and feel as though it were wasted
I wish for you to live fully in the now
and in accordance yourself
That is simplicity.

I ask myself time to time
What is it that I deserve?
Do I deserve anything?
Am I owed anything?

By simply existing
I know I am owed nothing.
This life is greater than
anything I could possibly
feel that I am owed.

I am both of this world
and a part of it.
I am forever both
in life and death.

A spirituality that is waking
in the summer sun.

Honey,
how I have loved you,
love you still.

Nothing is forever
Only that which matters
can endure

We want peace and happiness
before it is too late
But can it ever be too late
if it is always eternally now?

The illumination of consciousness

True beauty is beyond body.

We drink from a well of slow acting poison
and let it seep into our thoughts and hearts
The poison will not kill our bodies but it will
turn us against one another and let misunderstanding
spread like a blooming cancer
We are caught and helpless and can no longer
taste what we are drinking
We must wake once more
Can we
We must

Morning 6/25/17

Silent morning
I awake to your presence
and drink of absence
How long will these hours last?
They will pass once the day
has fully awaken
Until then
there is now
and there always
will be now


Is it fair to say I am looking for the soul
of that which is undefinable?

I wish to work beyond the limitations
I have built for myself, we have built
for ourselves. To say this is easy, to
accomplish this is difficult.

There is much to say
and only so many words
with which to say it
Open your mouth
Grab a pen
Prepare
Be ready
Let it be your truth
Your gospel

Awake

Awake
and yet

How to change

Easy-
it will be difficult
and gradual

Possible
always possible

Morning 6/21/17

warmth of summer morning
what awaits
dawn and sunset
pass in time
passing time

Journey Home

Light growing dim in the sky
You watch from bed through the window
You ask your daughter to let the breeze in

Slowly-

Essence lifts
into the

sky

Morning 6/20/17

There are no doors that can be walked through
until we are ready to walk through them.

Am I seeking from the Universe that which I am
most searching for inside myself?

To be human and divine. To be perfect and flawed.

Morning Meditations.

Finding stillness in a world of perpetual motion.

Peace through sound.

Narrative? What voice? What story?

I am listening. Tell me everything.

The hidden world of the soul
radiates outward into the known world.

The Universe Within.

If I listen, I will hear.
If I hear, I will know.
If I know, I will remember.
If I remember, I will act.

We must live out the truth of ourselves
we feel grow within.

Waking & Walking

This hour of waking
Have you slept enough
Cough
Throat is sore
Cannot go back to sleep
Sit down
Find some words
Tell them
what to do
They obey
Rest on the page
like you told them
Look at them
Try to decide
if it's good enough
They don't know
what you're thinking
Change them
or leave them be

walking through doors
memory
years collapse
in order no order
water colors spilled
cover the canvas
turn the knob
walk through
endlessly repeating
turn the lights on
off when you leave
walking through
here in place
unable to be still
walk until
stillness takes hold

Hey, Fred

I saw you last night in my dream. It was unexpected
but it was good to see you again, my old friend. You
were dressed up in a nice suit. When you saw me
walk in I went over and we hugged since we hadn't
seen each other in so many years. You looked great.
I even asked if you had lost weight. It seemed like
you were getting ready to get married. There were
many people there I did not recognize but that didn't
matter. It mattered that you were there. We talked
as you finished getting ready and then I because of
how busy you were at the moment I made sure to
excuse myself to let you get going. It felt good
seeing you again, even if only in a dream,

Morning 6/16/17

What dream wakes you in the morning?

Thought unleashes itself at any point of consciousness
One must then decide on how to act or if to act

To wake without speaking

To be still is not enough
To listen is not enough
How much or what
is enough?
That answer is one
only you can give.

I dream of a better body
but realize only I have made myself
be this way. Only I can change
my patterns of consumption
in order to achieve greater sense
of clarity in me
Why is change so difficult?
Because it is
Because it must

All of life is thought and action.

False relief
False enlightenment
is a plague

Choice and action reveal character.

How scared we are to reveal ourselves fully
To be scared of judgement for our humanity

Music for healing the wounds of the universe.

What calls us forth to rise?
Life's heartbeat
It's steady rhythm
Never letting us forget

To be spiritual and human
Tied to this world through body

Give away that which you do not need.

Morning 6/15/17

Birds of Dawn

Love so wholly
that you will give up
the love of your life
in order to let
them achieve true
happiness.

Life within you
Growing and nurturing
Release into the world
Let it live and be
Mother of the world
Feminine divine

Morning 6/14/17

"Our journey's end is our journey home.
Our journey home is our journey's end."

The path unfolds before us.
It is not paved in concrete
merely in some foot steps
to guide us along.

I will listen and I will follow
to reach the places I must

Dream beyond what this life is.
Look behind what is here
and find what has always been.

Morning 6/13/17

If I wake I must also dream.
This world that greets me
I recognize as now
A present perpetual

This life grows and diminishes
with each passing of the sun.

Searching for peace
I search within
and without

Calling God by a name you do not recognize
but He will hear it all the same.

These early hours of the day speak through me
Are given voice by passing thoughts of
this waking mind.

The Way
to speak of it is to not understand it
but to not know of it and still live in
accord with it is to know better than
any student of it.

To live, love, and trust.

to know truth
we must purge ourselves
of thoughts of unworthiness
we are worthy of knowledge
this life offers to us all

Truth will always speak.

Turn away from the false pleasure that brings no relief.
Turn towards the light you seek. Within is the journey
towards knowledge and a higher self.

How do I balance impulsive pleasure with striving towards
a better self? I must. I must.

A better light, a better life.

No question is without answer.
No journey is without a path.

To be more than mere man
To be enlightened
To be the light

This pattern of routine is not the path you seek.
What then? How must you change?
What must you change? The answers are here.
Look into the heart of the morning
and know the truth.
Act upon this knowledge.

If this drink does not bring you pleasure why consume it?
If this food does not bring you nourishment why eat it?
Do not be content with the patterns of ease you have made.

Define yourself not merely by words but by concrete action.
You are the sum of your choices.

Face the light of yourself.

Truth is revealed word by word.

Accept difficulty and hardship
as the parents of change.
You are the child of their union.
You will be better for this trial.

If I call to God will he answer?
If I call to God will I hear my own voice?

To live is to be weak.
To live is to be strong.
To live is to be both at alternating times.

You are seeking strength
not merely of body
but of heart, spirit, and soul.

Do we all fear inability?
We must not cave to these thoughts
but look within to strength lying in wait
for the right time to be used.

thoughts of a day

I am an incarnation of the now.

This life lives through me
within me

Do not presume to know
how you will get to your final destination.

If good was better.

If we are not searching we are not living.

baptized by salt water

to wake early is to witness the world emerge from
the darkness and into itself. to see the sun reveal it's
face by the gradual shift of the sky. birds speak in
babel talk and I wonder how or if they can decode
the languages between them. sunday morning and
the church bells will toll soon. to wake and to worship
as our fathers and mothers before us. my church
surrounds me at all times. i kneel before the ocean
and am baptized in salt water. this life healing and
renewing me. I who can be weary wish only to live
in the state of joy and happiness. to do so is to foster
that within and bring it to the world.

Brief Eternity

images of the body
beauty within
how does one recognize
what burns in the soul

chords struck and comp
on the piano
notes glisten down
a glissando run

heaven makes itself known
behind closed eyes
passion of the moment
breathing to the beat

to witness beauty
is to know beauty forever
beyond body and into
this shifting world

your eyes are the sun
and the moon and I
can only look upon you
in pure adoration

I have found the eternal
in these fleeting moments
and I will remember for all
of my brief eternity

Reveal

The slow reveal of morning
the turning of the hours
the fading of night
birds emerging from rest
bodies turning in their beds
lovers pressed against one another
dreams passing through
the lens of the mind
music plays and calls us
to wake or to worship
this gift given and renewed
for another day
how fortunate we are
i look upon this world
and let myself wonder
and accept what is before me
i wonder what could be
changed and bettered
and tell myself it starts
within me within my actions
within my own thoughts
and it does
and it should
and i know this
a creature of this world
and the next

Morning 6/10/17

Am I the Mountain or the Sea?

Finding myself
what is there to find
all that which is hidden
by the hands of life
obscured yet remaining
memory reveals

if I am the universe
all my words are it's song

if you are the universe
we sing in harmony

to be united through
the beautiful and unseen

from the same mother we came
to her embrace we shall return

to be whole
to be conscious
to be alive

to sing the names of God

because time is fleeting
because life is ending
because we are aging
because the world is changing
because we become older
because we seek to define

Unite Mind and Body
Unite Heart and Soul

From the light
Into this place
Home

What I Told Myself Today

the cracking sound from the joint of
my middle finger on my left hand
still persists.

i wake and find myself still alive for
another day

this life has not yet given up on me

do the gods listen to fools like me?

even if they do not listen we must
keep them entertained

will this life ever be perfect

of course not

in spite of this
how beautiful it is

together at dawn
morning warmth embraces me
touch turns electric

Progress, My Dear

Must we always be in such a hurry?
Cars on the motor-way
flying past each other as they
shudder and shake
at their speed
The destination is unchanged
regardless of when we arrive
The land will not leave us

A better world starts with you.
A better world starts within.

Clarity can be attained but it must be held and built upon.

This struggle does not have to be forever.

Change and Fear

How much can we really grow and change
if we readily submit to fear?

Fear is a thing which has many tendrils in the
mind but can be overcome.

Often it is not merely one action but many
small ones taken in order to change our reaction.

Do not be afraid to get out of this comfortable
bubble. What you want may be just outside

of this range. In fact, I'm sure it is.

Self Motivation for Today

Don't rush it. Start off slow. What do you mean?
What are you talking about? I'm talking about
slowing down your vices. Why? Because it'll be
good for you. Really? Yes. Why are you even
questioning that? I suppose I've grown comfortable
with my vices. They're an easy way to cope with
life. Do you really want the easy way with that
though? Is that going to make you happy and
fulfilled in the long run? Maybe but when you
put it that way probably not. I enjoy my drinking
and the way I feel but I know it's been a bit much
lately. At least you can admit that to yourself. Yeah
but I suppose that's the point where I should pump
the brakes. How about this...what if you just not
do it today? Pretty easy, right? I guess it is. Then
just try that. Try it for yourself. You have nothing
to lose and if it goes fine then you can try that again
the next day. You have to see yourself in relation
to the larger shifts in this life. What will yield the
best and greatest results? You have been thinking
incessantly recently and this would fit well into
all of that. Just try it. You've done it before and
can do it again. You are of that strength and will
power. I suppose I am. There is nothing wrong
with exerting that level of control again. Why
would there be? Give yourself credit for your
self-awareness but follow through. Start out today
with this thought: what kind of life do you wish
to lead? Answer that honestly and try to live in
accordance with that. You are your own reward.
I believe in you. I am you. We can do this.

If I fall in love will it 
be this way forever?

Hold These Together

my hand will not be held unless I let it be
this life is boundless in it's changes and
pitfalls living through these days I am left
to think about my mistakes and good luck

must I reorient myself to a larger goal to
move towards I think upon this and believe
this should be the case what goal and to
what end do i wish to move towards it

we could have met this morning but I know
that will not be so maybe in a few more
weeks we'll have the time to be together
again even if just for a morning breakfast

am i ready Alice to see the place of your
spirituality the place where the waters of
the soul moved as waves back and forth
to the invisible shore of the heart and soul

the simple act of you singing and playing
guitar is enough to overwhelm my heart
to know you exist to know this is your
effect on me doesn't fail to astonish

I who desire peace and enlightenment
what am I doing to nurture this change
in the world words cannot be enough
action however small is still action

Morning 6/3/17

rise with the birds

Symptom or the Cure 

Fictional Symmetry

Morning 6/2/17

Big answers to small questions.

I must find joy in the present.
This time
NOW
This is NOW
Imperative
Exclamation
Full stop
Know this
Past and Future
Non-existent
Fully now
Breathing in
Plan
Prepare
but NOW
is the answer
and the question

Movements

If we cannot accept our basic flaws
how are we to better ourselves?
If we are unhappy with our actions
are we not the ones in control
of them? Do we not have the
ability to make the small and slow
changes to improve our lives?
We are better than our weaknesses.
I have to believe and know that
life will not be this way forever.
It can change. It will change
if we start moving towards the
light even if it takes a lifetime.

Questions

I have begun to ask myself how can we balance
our need to live in the present
with our desire to project into the future
as well as remember the past?
Does one hinder another?
How do the creatures of our world
exist without the weight of
consciousness on them?
Perhaps I do them a disservice
and they bear the weight
differently.
Would I feel differently
about this life
if I had wings with which
to view the world
from the air?
Or would I feel differently
if I could live beneathe
the waves of the ocean?
We live and fight
through the days we've been given
because we must
because happiness is never something
that merely is
it must be worked on
and earned.

Morning 6/1/17

We turn to face the light
much as the sunflower
follows the sun across
the sky

To live an honest life we must face
uncomfortable truths about ourselves.

The sky has no center and looms over us all

Drowning in air
Walking through this
What now
What of this

How early do the birds wake?

I do not know

I haven’t asked them

But most mornings

When I awake

They are there

Already chirping to one another

A small comfort in this world

To hear their sounds

Calling back and forth

The View

We were sitting in my car watching the waves
come in and out from the beach. We were
waiting for nothing in particular.We had just
had breakfast a town over and felt like coming
here. It was the kind of beach without much
there except for the sand and water. No fancy
bars and restaurants, just sand waves. Pure
simplicity. I cannot say how long it was that
we sat there. It could have been half an hour,
it could have been a few hours, I don't know.
I remember holding her hand and kissing her.
I remember listening to her breathing.
I remember feeling her body through her clothes.