the bankrupt business of love

if you choose to play
perhaps it could be easier
to play
in the games
of life
if i were more interested
in its rules
and order.
as it turns out
i'm not very interested.
so we remain
at an icy
impasse.


self voyeur
watching videos of recent memories
makes me think that perhaps
life is bound to keep getting more interesting
unless it has already peaked
that is.

professor
you learn some things in the only way
that can be learned,
through sheer stupidity.
after the first lesson
it gets much harder
if you didn't pay attention
this first time through.

don't do it
i wonder what dignity there is
in the way i am living my life
versus
everyone else i've known
who has settled in
and now
merely wait for death.

that's always the case
sometimes all anyone could want
is the quiet respite
of home and the familiar.
but as i've come to see,
sometimes that's
the very last thing
you need.

a pause in recent routine
i am giving my demon
a run for his money
these days
before we meet up again
at the end of the week
for our regularly scheduled
descent
into spirits.

stop
i could keep
going on and on
but then
that would be
just
wasted words
on
space that isn't
really there.
so,
this is where
tonight
ends.