Unedited Freewrite Excersize #4

dont worry let the words falls from the sky let your hands free
themselves from your rational reason let it fall apart let if fall
apart let yourself go let go of that ego go go go go to any where
you fear to be this is just practice for the big production that
isn't happening its just too soon too eventual its far too simple
to make sense of random acts of violence though the random
acts of kindness can be just as violent like the creatures we
are pinning hope on the hopeless hoping for less but its just
a matter of energy and flow draining from and into you does
it seem like your head is falling apart its not making sense &
does it ever really need to it doesn't need to it never should its
just this an emptiness permanence offset by the fleeting that
burns so bright you can't sleep light shining through the blinds
your being afraid to let itself slip into the abyss but its always
temporary its always temporary until it gets us until its takes
us from this place into the plane where truths reveal an energy
that is endless and formless or existing in a way that is beyond
the limits of any physical form i want to go back but to where
there is no where back there that holds anything new unless
we changed the course of our history to learn new lessons
loves not lived from moments skipped over and forgotten
like so many humans lost to dust over centuries the grains
sand mirror the stars as the sun mirrors the heart of our love
there is an endless fountain pouring water from its being into
rivers that flow into an ocean in that ocean there is nothing
but fish swimming through the ruins of our lives the empty
cities we built and ruined the street paved with algae the
whales swimming over roads like eagles once did over our
forests but oh how long ago that was and when it was it was
an age best forgotten our hindsight is too clear we have not
forgotten we remember all too well and when the night ends
what can any of us do but pour another drink into that empty
space that threatens to consume the universe but then it glows
within you and sets your limbs into motion and your tongue into
verbal acrobatics while the brain struggles to retain control of
its unruly employees who like nothing more than to take it easy
after a long day of being themselves and taking orders from
the grey haired boss in the office upstairs but even the boss
doesn't mind the drink needs the drink lets his employees buy
a round and then it goes round and round and round like the
ground beneathe his feet hands searching and clinging trying
to hold on to the face of the earth fearful for the absence of
gravity because that would spell the end of everything and if
everything were to end then what would happen to the nothing
would just get itself together and go somewhere else or would
it just continue to be uncaring and unneeding of you and all
that you bring such a wondrous thing to be there and then when
it was how it wasn't when it could have been something but
we still dream slowly but when we wake the sun breaks and
shakes our limbs slowly as we adjust to the cold mixing warmth
on our skin we wake wake so glorious watch the sun smiling
shining trying to bring us out and up out and up and we get up
from under the sheets and into the streets trying to get to the night
and to bed again trying to make it back home only to sleep
once more only to wake again only to sleep only to wake again
only to sleep only to wake again only to continue the cycle
because it is endless because it is a story that will out live us
all this story has never needed us but has liked having us
around theres always another actor born to take our place
to keep the play running until the director decides the production
has run its course and all the actors go home to night and
memory waiting for the next script to read, to memorize,
to live once again.