Conflict

I'm tired of wearing this uniform
and fighting these wars with myself
What is there to be won
with this constant conflict
There isn't anything worth it
Yet I return again and again
as though it matters
as though this is something
that can save me
that can heal me
It isn't and it won't
I'm smart enough to realize it
It isn't easy living in this body
Dealing with a mind ready to
surrender to any form of relief
no matter how it may turn out
This life is a gauntlet of
experiences to be fought through
There is no harder fight
than the one within